Friday, February 24, 2012

finishing well

There's a lot of things I don't really finish well. For instance...

I have no problem doing laundry until it reaches the folding and putting away stage and that's when I casually "take a break" and eventually just wear all the clothes in the pile for two weeks until it's time for another wash.

I actually love grocery shopping but I always find myself lingering in the store, browsing items I have no intention of buying, simply avoiding at all costs returning home to restock the cabinets and fridge.

Speaking of groceries, I don't believe I can recall a time that I've finished a bag of grapes or a bunch of bananas, yet I continue to purchase them telling myself, "this time I'll finish them all I swear!"

These things may seem fairly trivial in passing but what I've begun to realize is it's often the little things can make the biggest differences in our lives. The little lies, deceits, or secrets we know of ourselves and in our hearts. The things even people around us may have taken notice of while we have grown dull to the prodding of our conscience against our stubborn will to resist real change or growth.

I just spent last weekend as a volunteer youth leader on a winter retreat with Hope Student Ministry in the Outer Banks. It was a refreshing time of community and bonding with some younger guys who I've gotten to know pretty well since moving to Richmond. Two of them in particular are seniors in high school, just a few months away from beginning the next chapter of their lives in college.

One of the things I prayed for the two of them more specifically during the weekend was that they would finish well. I remember how incredible it was to leave high school knowing my identity was found in Christ and taking that confidence with me to Blacksburg where my faith flourished. I hope for the same type of transition for those guys. I pray they continue to recognize the importance of seeking God as they move forward in their lives, asking for guidance and expecting an adventure. I pray that He would bless them for their faith.

For this lenten season, for forty days I'm challenging myself to drink only tap water and not eat out (yes, that includes Chickfila). It's going to be interesting these first few days to see how often I have to check myself from picking up a cup of coffee at work or stopping by Jimmy John's on my lunch break or even just having a beer on Friday after a long work week. My only hope is that I can finish well, that I wouldn't fall prey to a passive approach towards the end of the forty days and make excuses to compromise.

Where do you notice passivity and opportunities for growth in those areas? Is it something you can really focus on through the next few weeks? 

Sunday, January 15, 2012

broken cisterns

If you know me well enough, you'll probably know that I'm kind of into music. And by kind of I mean I LOVE it. I love listening to it, singing it, playing it...you name it, if it involves music I'm interested. I often find my roommates or friends asking, "Hey, what's some good new music I should hear or who's making moves in the music world?". I love that. I love that people who know me know that I'm someone to come to for good music recommendations. It might even be a prideful thing but that's another blog for another day.

Now if you know me really really well, you'll probably know that my all-time favorite band is Switchfoot. They've been making great records for years and they're still going strong. I might even say they're only getting better as they get older, which isn't easy to do. The lead singer is Jon Foreman, an artist that I admire a lot for his unique creativity and honorable character. He's done several side projects over the years, some of which being solo EP albums. In one of his songs titled "The Cure for Pain" the first verse goes like this:

So I'm not sure why it always flows downhill,
why broken cisterns never could stay filled.
I've spent ten years singing gravity away,
but the water keeps on falling from the sky

I think a good portion of music is left open to interpretation for the listener, but more often than not lyrics are personal reflections of the heart and mind of the artist. These lyrics speak to me loud and clear. In this verse alone I find a message that has resonated over and over again through different periods of my life. Like I said before, I think a lot can be said for interpretation but what I think he's trying to say with these lyrics is that God is persistent.

The song speaks of God's willingness to grant us renewal and mercy regardless of our attempts to cling to life without Him. The lyrics tell the story of our rebellious hearts and God's persistence that tears down the walls we hide behind. We try with all our might to be self-sufficient, to find life apart from Him, shouting to the heavens, "Hey, you up there I can do this on my own!". Yet the water in our broken cisterns disappears and while we desperately look for answers He keeps the water falling from the sky.

I feel what a lot of people would get from this is God is faithful but I've never quite understood the theology of that. We are called to be faithful, to believe in the unseen, to walk by faith, to hope for He who is yet to come. God being faithful is a nice idea for some people I suppose, but it doesn't seem strong enough, at least not for me. I'm talking about God being persistent, so I thought it would be helpful to list some synonyms of the word persistent just to get a better idea of the point I want to make. Here are just a few: determined, constant, endless, enduring, perpetual, relentless, steadfast, and my favorite...stubborn.

I relate well to stubbornness because it's such a human quality in comparison to the other ones I listed. I wouldn't consider myself perpetual or relentless, but stubborn is definitely on my level. It might not be biblically correct to say God is stubborn because of this little thing called grace, but I am comforted knowing that all I cannot be, He is. He is all of those words and more, unimaginably more.

No matter how much I push away, fight, or ignore all of who God is and what He has for me...I cannot escape His persistence. It's literally never-ending and surely incomprehensible. He is on our side, he is for us, He is with us. Does that make sense? Some days it does, some days it seems like the furthest thing from the truth. We're not made to fully understand it, only embrace and live in it. Thanks to Jon Foreman for helping me understand that.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

presence in 2012

It's very strange to think I began this blog in 2010. I somehow lived more than a whole year before returning to this tonight. This outlet for my thoughts will obviously serve a different purpose now, as it originated as a method of chronicling my time in Ecuador.

A brief summary of current events in my life: living in Richmond with four awesome guys, working full-time as a Montessori preschool teacher, and finding life through community at Hope Church. I know that's not much, but as we say in our house, "don't get caught up with the details".

I'm returning to this blog somewhat because I stink at journaling. I've tried over and over again to no avail. Doesn't matter how cool or functional my current "journal" might be, I fizz out after two or three days of nonsensical scribble. It's weird because I like writing, I would almost say I love writing. So when I sit down to write in a journal it should just naturally flow from pen to paper, right? Nope. One day I would really like to be able to do that because it's sad to see the written word disappearing from our generation. I say this while having just finished reading an entire book via PDF and have just begun another. I attribute this solely to lack of funds for book purchases and my roommate's inability to read books as quickly as I would like.

As 2012 is beginning to hit first gear I have noticed that a lot of people around me and the general popular thing to do is forgo any typical New Year's resolutions. Instead the trend is to pick a word or phrase that is a characterization of sorts for 2012, in other words what you hope to live out in your life for the next year. As I've been thinking about this concept a lot coming back from a trip to Passion 2012 in Atlanta, I've been constantly encountering my word:

Presence.

For me, it carries layered significance. Presence, this year to desire more of the life-giving presence of my God and Savior, to seek it out more earnestly and wholeheartedly to not only see my life transformed by His power but simply worship Christ with everything for being all I need.

Presence, to be content where I am right now. That I might truly be present, not longing for where I hope to be next year, not where I know some cool people are doing cool things, not where I wish I could escape, but where God has led me to at this very moment to honor His will and wait patiently as He prepares my heart for the next journey.

Presence, to purposefully engage the amazing community I currently find myself in. Building new relationships, wholly embracing the already fruitful ones I share. I hope to discover more of God's identity through some incredible people, conversations, and experiences over the course of this year.

As I sat on the couch in the enormous living room of our house tonight listening to a friend share his journey and receiving some wisdom from a mentor, I realized this is it - this is what I'm searching, seeking, even running after in 2012. Learning and loving and living, all the while giving my Father the glory.

I guess we'll see how long this blogging thing goes. I'm hopeful, cautiously optimistic that it will withstand 2012 and this time next year I'll be blogging strong...is that a thing? Blogging strong, strong blogging? Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

siga no mas

Well, last time I said I wouldn't go so long without updating...oops. It's been five weeks! I really can't understand how fast the last two months have gone by. By now it will be kind of difficult to recount the last five weeks so I will sum it up.

In October I traveled a lot, nearly every weekend I believe. I finally went to the coast with my friends Kristin, Katherine, and Chantal and we stayed in Tonsupa for a few days. I usually don't like the beach but there's just something very enticing about the Pacific Ocean in South America. Afterwards, Katherine's friend Anna came to visit from the states so we all went to Baños where I kind of felt like a dad taking my family on vacation since I had been there previously. We stayed there for two days and had a great time. The day after we got back I left for the Amazon and the Tiputini Biodiversity Station owned by USFQ. There were about twenty international students in total and we all got along so well and had an awesome weekend experiencing all the crazy stuff the rainforest has to offer.

In other news, the weather in Quito has become a major downer the last couple of weeks because of the combination of the La Niña current of the coast and the fact that it's typically "winter" during November and December. We're talking torrential downpours and frigid cold every day...weak. Luckily, the last few days it's been improving with less lluvia and more sol. Since this is not much of an update per se, I thought in the spirit of Thanksgiving I would make a list of things that I am both thankful for and love about living in Ecuador. Let's see:

-speaking spanish every day and actually seeing improvements in my capabilities
-chifles (plantain chips) & creamsicle ice cream bars
-going out to random places with friends and ending the night dancing til we're exhausted
-bus rides to and from school
-learning new dances like merengue and salsa
-running in La Carolina with my iPod on a sunny morning
-Liga soccer games
-my classes, professors, and people in them
-my favorite $1.50 pirated DVD store
-shooting the breeeze with taxi drivers
-my "family" who makes each day interesting
-my host family's antics that never cease to make me laugh

That's all I can come up with right now, I'm sure there's tons of little things I forgot. Right now I'm just preparing for the final stretch of the semester filled with tests, presentations, papers, etc. I'm looking forward to December 9th when I will be done with school and free to do whatever with friends until most of them fly out on the 19th. After that I will only have another semester of school until I'm officially a graduate (hopefully) of Virginia Tech...it's about time. Until then, I better get to work! Hope this finds everyone doing well and enjoying Thanksgiving with friends and family...I'm thankful for each of you! Hasta luego!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Has it really been three weeks since my last post?! Sorry! I guess I have a lot to talk about...where to start? I think I'll start with Jesus. I have been learning the hard way here that my life really is not about me...not my desires, not my problems, not my worries...none of it. My life is about living for the one who died for me so that I could live this life to the fullest, free of the burdens and condemnation of this world. Learning to love an entirely new group of people here over the past two months has been challenging because I continually find myself making comparisons to the unbelievable community I was blessed with at VT. On the other hand, I am so grateful for the people God has placed around me here and the opportunities I have to live out His love in those relationships. I was having trouble paying attention in church yesterday and as I was flipping through my bible I came across Colossians 1:3-14, and was really just blown away by what God has given us through his Son. I'm challenged by this verse to truly live, speak, think, and love like a man called by God to be a light and give glory to the kingdom of Heaven. Please read it if you can, it is an incredible message and I'm even considering memorizing the book of Colossians in Spanish!

As far as school goes, last week was loco. I had three midterm exams, two papers, a report, and a presentation within two days of class. Needless to say I was a little overwhelmed because I didn't come to Ecuador to do stinkin' homework! I'm eager to see some of the results from last week this coming week, it could be pretty funny. Luckily, as long as I just pass the classes I need for Spanish I will get the credit and graduate as planned in May. In my international relations class, we received our country assignments for the Model UN in November and I dare you to guess who I got...whatever you're thinking is wrong. My country is Burkina Faso. Burkina Faso. Really? I can't tell you the first thing about this place so it should be an interesting project.

Last weekend I was supposed to go on another Volcanology field trip which didn't really go as planned. I hadn't paid for the trip beforehand so technically I shouldn't have gone to the bus on Satuday morning but I thought I'd try my luck and turned out I had none and got kicked off the bus along with my friend Cody from App St. We decided since we were up and about already to just go to Baños for the day and meet up with the group there that night. We got a bus at 9:30 from the farthest terminal in the south of Quito and took us about three and a half hours to get there. I used good ol' LP (Lonely Planet) to find us a sweet hostel followed by hawaiian pizza for lunch. We decided to rent bikes for five bucks and ride down to a waterfall about twelve miles away called Pailon del Diablo. The ride was incredible, filled with amazing views. The waterfall was also breathtaking, and freezing cold. We got a ride back in the back of a camioneta (pick-up) and went directly to the hot springs just a quarter-mile from our hostel. This was one of the best experiences I've had in Ecuador. There are three pools, a super-heated 118-degree hot tub, a warm pool, and a cold bath as well. We were freezing from the rain so the hot pool was actually too hot, but we eventually figured out if you alternate between the really hot pool and the freezing cold one your body gets this incredible sensation that is actually kind of addicting and made it hard to leave.

We met up with Dan (VT guy) and his roommate for the night Diana and headed out to get some food around town. After eating we went to check out this bar with a pool table. We rented the table for a two dollar per hour rate and played a combination of Ecuador and England rules because Diana had lived in England for most of her life. We ended up hanging out with two other English guys and a German guy who were traveling and went with them to a club called Leprechaun which was really a cool place. This place had two dance floors, one downstairs and one upstairs and then an open-air section with a fire pit...and all three of these locations had their own bar. I started dancing with this Ecuadorian girl and we ended up dancing for like three hours, with some salsa and merengue thrown in there which was good practice for me. The next morning Cody and I were able to get on the bus with our class somehow and finish the trip with Theo talking about the volcano Tungurahua which is just outside Baños and is still very active.

The soccer season has officially started for my team and we are 1-1 on the season. Our first game was bogus because for most of the second half the other team was playing with an extra man but we didn't notice until they scored the winning goal and saw seven of their players on the field. What is the referee being paid for anyways? We won our next game easily and play again this Wednesday. I've also been playing once a week with my pastor Aldo and some of his friends at a huge complex called Fútbol City with four or five turf fields which is so much fun. I've yet to attend a soccer game here in Quito but I hope to soon. I think I've decided to pledge my allegiance to Liga, one of the popular teams down here, simply because I really like their jersey.

This weekend's volcanology trip is to Crucita, which is on the coast! Honestly, the beach doesn't do it for me but I have never seen the Pacific and I'm sure beaches here a step above what I've experienced before. I'm going to stay at a friend's house instead of paying for whatever hotel Theo has lined up, so that should be fun. It's hard to believe there's only two months left in this semester...time is going by quickly. Thankfully, I have another seven wonderful months in this country! I'll try not to let three weeks pass before the next update, hope you all are enjoying them!

Monday, September 27, 2010

isaiah 26:8

"Yes, Lord, walking in the ways of Your truth, we wait for you; Your name and renown are the desires of our hearts."

So, I just finished watching the Passion 2011 Live Link from my computer. They were broadcasting from Georgia Tech's campus in Atlanta. Louie Giglio, Chris Tomlin, and the whole gang were there to worship and share a bit about what's going on in the Passion movement. I was reminded over and over again of the incredible experience I had at Passion 2010 in Atlanta this past January...hard to believe it was only ten months ago! The message was a reminder to be "awake, confident, and available". Awake (1 Corinthians 2:6-9): to the truth that outside of our very small lives and what we see every day on the news or Facebook or whatever...there is a story going on that tells of God's faithfulness and His amazing purpose for our lives. Confident (Isaiah 46:3-5): that those who have believed in Christ are now called sons and daughters, heirs of an eternal kingdom and that the Lord is continually working for our good. Available (Isaiah 64:1-4): to be ready in each moment to follow God's leading to a place, person, or people.

Even though at this moment I'm pretty positive that I'll be here in Quito until next May, right now I feel like I'm facing a lot of questions. I think a lot about questions concerning what I might do next when I get back. I think a lot about questions in my relationships with people from home and new people here. I have so many passions that I want to see fulfilled in my life and I have no idea how to go about doing so. The greatest comfort is to know that in whatever circumstance I'm in or question I struggle with, my God is going before me to prepare a way. I'm realizing that I'm so blessed to be a part of God's story and that nothing I do can change how much He loves me.

My 22nd birthday has now come and gone and I am relishing the wonderful number that is now my age. I feel slightly strange telling most people here how old I am because to them I actually am old whereas back at home nearly all my friends are older than me. Regardless, my birthday was a combination of some of my favorite things: pizza for lunch, playing tennis, watching the Braves play (and lose unfortunately), and dancing. My Ecuadorian friend Carlos took myself and the girls to lunch in Tumbaco, a small town just outside of campus in Cumbayá, at a place called Pizza SA that the girls had been raving about. Then we went back to campus because the girls had class and Carlos and I were going to play tennis. I realized that tennis is probably the best sport to play at high altitude because it doesn't require an excessive amount of running. Later that evening my friend Nelson and I headed to Mulligan's Pub in Mariscal to watch the Braves-Phillies game, a frustrating 1-0 loss. Then we met the girls at our favorite bar before going to the salsa club at ten.

This weekend we had our first two field trips with volcanology class to Lake Cuicocha, which is just outside of Otavalo, and to Papallacta (or somewhere around there). On Saturday we took a bus right up to the volcanic lake and went on a little boat ride while Theo explained how it was made in Spanish which meant I didn't understand/pay much attention. The rest of the day we stopped at random spots on the highway to draw different kinds of faults in the rock formations...I'm sure we all looked ridiculous standing there looking at a rock wall and doodling away. Overall, it wasn't a very exciting trip and the highlight was probably eating oreos for lunch. Sunday was a much different story as we spent the day in search of eight different rocks to collect, label, and bag for our reports. This meant climbing up and down hills where you could literally lose a shoe or break an ankle if you made a misstep. Theo highly enjoys watching his students follow him around like pets and making us do things that we don't necessarily need to do, but enhances his experience that much more. Needless to say, I was very dirty and very tired when I got home yesterday evening.

This week could be the busiest yet. I've started playing ultimate frisbee in Parque Carolina on Tuesdays after class. I believe the soccer team I joined at USFQ starts practicing this week. I also have bible study on Tuesday evenings at seven and I've been told we may be able to start working with the kids at the orphanage this week as well! Hannah, Ashley, and I also have a potential meeting with a man from an organization called Youth World that does sports ministry with kids in Quito. I guess I might have some homework to do too, but let's be honest that's probably the least of my concerns. This weekend I think I am going to stick around to watch the Hokies put a beatdown on undefeated NC State...hopefully I will not regret that decision. Please be praying for divine guidance as I make choices each day here, that I will be intent on serving Christ with my heart, mind, and actions at all times. Much love, nos vemos pronto!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

así no más

¡Buenas noches!

It's time for an update! Things here in Quito are going well. Classes are in full swing and homework is becoming more frequent, but not more difficult fortunately. The first trip with my volcanology class is coming up this weekend and it should be fun because there aren't many people signed up for this one! We're going to Cuicocha and Papallacta to check out two volcanoes and some hot springs! Along with my friends Dan and Cody, I joined a fútbol team on campus in a league that includes the professors. Apparently we'll get a jersey with our name and number on it for like five or six bucks each, qué chévere!

Last time I updated I was about to go on a trip to a small pueblo called Otavalo with my friends Hannah, Ashley, and Colleen (from this point on they will be referred to as "the girls" for simplicity's sake). After a frustrating morning waiting at the censo office only to find out that they ran out of cards to print off and would have to come back, we took off on the bus from terminal norte in Quito. It only cost two bucks for the bus ride and on the way we were lucky enough to catch a Jean Claude Van Damme flick called "Sudden Death" (terrible movie, but it seems they love him in South America). We got to Otavalo around four that afternoon and made our way to a hostel we had discovered in our trusty LP's (Lonely Planet guidebooks) call Rincon del Viajero. They had plenty of rooms so we rented two for the night, one for me and one for the girls, and then went out in search of a good dinner. A good dinner is exactly what we found, of course with the help of LP, at a little local restaurant called Mi Otavalito. I had grilled chicked with french fries and salad...delicioso.

After dinner we made a stop at a little ice cream shop for dessert and then headed back to the hostel to get some layers on before going to explore the nightlife. While walking around we had noticed a concert stage being set up in a plaza nearby, so we headed back there to check out the scene. On our way there we stopped at a pizzeria/bar that was probably one of the strangest restaurants I've ever been in, but they offered Cuba Libres (this is what they call rum and coke) for $1.50 so we couldn't pass it up. We finally made our way back to the plaza to find a ton of people watching as a number of different performers sang and danced to celebrate the culture and town of Otavalo. We hung out in the plaza and had some extra-strong but super-cheap canelazo (a warm fruity beverage made with sugar-cane alcohol) and enjoyed the music. We headed back to the hostel and I actually fell asleep in one of the hammocks on the roof before finally making it to my surprisingly comfortable bed. Breakfast the next morning was gratis (free) and it included coffee, bread, and eggs. We then made our way to the market, which I'm told is the largest indigenous hand-craft market in South America, and I have no problem believing that because it was huge! So much stuff to look at and so many people meandering through the different tables and tents. After we finished up shopping we hopped back on the bus to Quito for another two bucks and were home in two hours.

Yesterday I went to a really cool park in Quito with the girls and all of Ashley's ecuadorian cousins to celebrate her host brother Daniel's birthday. It was a heck of a long walk uphill, but when we arrived the views looking down into the valley and Cumbayá were incredible. We hung out for a while waiting for the food to be served and partook in some grilled steak appetizers with ají (a kind of salsa with garlic). Our plates were stacked with different kinds of grilled pork and sausages along with corn and potatoes...definitely a guy's meal and I loved it. The primos all continued celebrating with endless amounts of Pilsener and by the time we made our way back to the city they were all singing loudly their favorite spanish tunes. Shortly after I got home I met up with my friend Nelson to go check out some college football in the Mariscal. We observed some very interesting people and met some funny older guys at a bar who work for the U.S. embassy. I also noticed that without the girls around, no one was bugging me to come in their obnoxious club so that was kind of nice.

Today was the first service of Libertad, the church being pastored by our new Chilean friends Aldo and his wife Pame. Right now it's being held in a conference type room on the roof of the apartment building that they live in. The service today was mainly about casting the vision of this new church and stressing the importance of the people who need to be reached in Quito and around the world. I've never been a part of a church that is just starting and I'm excited to see how this church will grow and develop over the next eight months that I'm here. Starting next week we'll begin our first ministry project as a church with an organization in the city the works with orphaned children and single-parent families...I can't wait to love on these people and share the hope of Christ with them!

That's about it for this post. I'm about to turn twenty-two this coming Wednesday and I'm not sure anyone quite understands that I've been waiting for this my whole life because twenty-two is in fact my favorite number and will be my age for a whole year! Please pray for my new church and it's ability to effectively minister to the people we are called to. I miss you all and GO HOKIES!

¡Chao!