group therapy

It was around this time last year that I logged into Facebook from my little apartment in Quito, Ecuador and saw a few pictures of the Hope Youth Staff retreat. I had only met a handful of the people that were in attendance. To be honest, I was only interested because two of my best friends were involved, but as I looked through the pictures and continued to browse some of their photos I began to feel pretty sad.

Maybe sad isn't the right word because I'd say I was generally happy to be living abroad, traveling, and speaking Español every day. The word I'm looking for would probably be closer to lonely or empty. What I saw in those pictures was more than just the happenings in the lives of two close friends, it was a reminder of what a blessing community is.

Unfortunately, it was also a vivid wake up call that I was living without any form of real community. I met several people during my time in Ecuador who I consider dear friends and with whom I share many great memories. The problem is most of the people I spent my time with had probably never experienced the type of community I was coming from at Virginia Tech. Let's just say there's a high standard of what I look for in the group of people I surround myself with.

I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Your community is largely what determines the kind of person you become or strive to be. This is painfully obvious when you leave everything and everyone you've come to know well for the last four years of your life. I was not the man I wanted to be in Ecuador. It's hard for me to admit that on here. As my friend Nicole mentioned to me recently, a blog is just an expression and possibly even a reminder of things you actually believe about yourself. That being said, I'm not one to be too vulnerable. I don't regret the choices I made and in moving forward I know God was present each moment of those nine months where I was barely keeping my head above water.

Fast forward. I've just been tagged in a few pictures from the Hope Youth Staff retreat. It's been a year since I saw those pictures and longed to be back in a community where I am challenged and experience growth along with genuine love. In only one year God has brought me into a community that has welcomed me like they were just waiting for me the whole time.

The friends, leaders, students, and families that I have formed relationships with in this community are now something I value above all else. I was discussing this with two friends recently and I shared how this group of people is so intricate and unique that only a God-sized miracle could bring us all together at this point in our lives in Richmond. I am thankful for that because without this refreshing community I would still be clinging to something that is now a joyful but certainly distant memory.

On that note, if someone from my time abroad is reading this I want you to know that I'm glad our paths crossed. I'm thankful that God used you in my life to teach me how to love people well outside of a church. I'm thankful for your friendship and for making a confusing nine months pass by almost too quickly. I apologize if I didn't meet the same standards that I tend to require in choosing relationships. I want you to know that I love you, God loves you, and if you ever want to catch up please feel welcome to call. As we would say back in Ecua...siga no mas.

sunny days

The weather can make you do weird things. Like impulsively shaving the longest beard I've ever had after fifteen weeks on an unseasonably nice March day. Or maybe it was more weird that I grew a beard for that long because of the weather?

I don't think we really give the weather enough credit, we often underestimate the influence it has on our moods and decisions. Some people spend a lot of time worrying about the weather, almost as if they could actually do something about it or change it to suit their needs. We fret about how the rain is going to ruin our weekend plans. We stress about the temperature affecting our electric bills.

On the other hand, some could care less and walk out of the house unprepared for what the forecast may hold. We might wind up soaked from top to bottom in a downpour or maybe freezing cold without the proper attire. The ignorance is bliss rule doesn't usually play out well with weather.

Something about this sounds familiar.

We're all about control. Our attitudes concerning things like the weather reflect this in our nature. We want so badly to know what we can determine, calculate and judge based on the knowledge we have. Even those who choose not to be prepared for what lies ahead are still saying in a sense that nothing can control how I live my life, that they will be just fine without knowing what's to come.

What I'm suggesting is simply this- I don't think we give God enough credit. We sing songs of praise on Sundays, we bless our meals in His name, occasionally throw up a casual "thank God" for something of no real consequence.

I believe the more we pay attention to God, really focus in on who He is and what He's about, the more we begin to truly see what's going on around us. I believe when we're not freaking out about work next week, or when we're not just sleep-walking our way through life, God is eager to step in and reveal His glory and presence to us in a refreshing way each day we are given.

We can't worry our way into a right relationship with God that guarantees safety and stability. We also can't passively ignore the seriousness of what God's done for us and what He wants us to be for His glory. Our eternity hangs in the balance of our attitude towards Him.

God can make you do weird things. The presence of the Holy Spirit dwelling within us can cause us to make choices that even to ourselves may seem irrational. We can't even begin to fully understand some of the thoughts and desires God places in our hearts and minds. That's okay, at least most of the time I'm okay with it. Thankfully, our Father isn't living in the realm of weekend forecasts. Just enjoy the weather.